Where I’ve Been…

Posted on Posted in Self-Study

Hi all. It’s been awhile. If you keep up with me on Instagram you’ll know I was in an accident and broke my left hand, and if not – there it is!

I had a bad fall on March 20th and broke the 5th metacarpal of my left hand. I was bruised and scraped up, but my hand was the most serious aspect of the fall.

hand2

It wasn’t just that I slipped and fell, but I fell down an uncovered basement opening down 6 feet into the basement below. I was at a local tattoo parlor when it happened. They did not have the hole covered or roped off and I stepped backwards into it.

IMG_1241
They put the rope up after my fall.

I landed on my left side and my SI joints got jarred quite a bit, but I did not lose consciousness and was able to climb up out of the basement mostly unassisted.

I know how lucky I am, although I would say blessed. My Angels were there with me, this I know.

I went back to work a week later and really just tried to move past the trauma of it all without dealing with it, which was a mistake. All of it came up at once a couple weekends ago when they removed the cast. I realized I was using the cast as a sort of security blanket. I was pushing aside dealing with thoughts and feelings because my hand was broken and that was that. No big deal. I’m fine.

But I wasn’t fine.

When they told me the cast needed to come off I felt this sense of dread. Energy pooling in my chest. Fear. Sadness. Insecurity. All of that and the physical pain that comes along with a broken bone, somewhat atrophied muscles, and very tight tendons, joints, and ligaments.

IMG_1647
The day they cut off the cast.

I’m doing better now. I cried, and cried some more. I journaled, I talked, I embraced the pain!

Seriously though. This was a difficult experience. I’m an extremely independent person and having a broken hand does not lend itself to independence, at least not at first. My daughter and husband have been amazingly helpful and supportive through all of this.

I’m slowly getting the use of my left hand back. It does still hurt and anytime the weather turns dreary it is especially achy and painful. This is the most I’ve typed since the accident and truthfully, it hurts right now.

My asana practice has been extremely modified. I hardly practice at home anymore and have had to learn new techniques for teaching, although my students have been so kind and accepting of me and my temporary handicap.

Inverting with the safety of the cast. About 4 weeks into healing.
Inverting with the safety of the cast. About 4 weeks into healing.

I’m hoping to get back to sharing a post or two a week soon. I have some great recipes to share with you all!

Many, Many Blessings to all of you, and please know that whatever hardship you are going through WILL pass. You CAN use this as a point of personal growth. I know it feels shitty and hard. True growth is never easy. I see a sentiment pop up on IG every once in awhile, “Get comfortable being uncomfortable”. What a great way to put it.

One thought on “Where I’ve Been…

Leave a Reply